ideally, this is what i want my life to be right now. ideally, i would be that little kid in the picture holding this taller figure's hand (whomever he would be) (i would assume it would be a man, possibly some sort of fatherly-type figure), and he is leading me away from the darkened path, and towards/into the light. ideally, this is what i would want. but realistically, this is not what i'm going to get. my life is just about the opposite of this, completely reversed. i am NOT a child. i am NOT holding a man's hand. i am NOT walking away from the darness and into light. i AM rather, walking alone. i AM by myself - not a child, nor an adult. i AM walking, not necessarily away from the light, per se, but into the darkness. [this is all, of course, metaphorical and completely in my head.] my life is a black and white picture. a very colorless reality.
if words could explain and express the troubles of my heart, i would write them down. but since mere words cannot do such a thing, i am left with this picture.
walking away from the light, the answers and truth; walking into the darkness, the pain and wonder.
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